


Easy Love

by half_rice



Series: 97 line boys uni AU [1]
Category: GOT7, NCT (Band), SEVENTEEN (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: 97 line boys is lyf, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, M/M, if u squeamish u can skip the sex but there are important conversations happening, its like game of thrones that way, there is some JJP and some yoonjin but it's so background i don't wanna be clickbaity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-27
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-06 00:59:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12200787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/half_rice/pseuds/half_rice
Summary: University AU in which the 97 line boys try to get Jungkook and Yugyeom back together. The problem is, neither of them want to admit they were even together in the first place. Exhausting.





	1. 1 week post-breakup

**Author's Note:**

> Everyone’s going to college because I just want my boys to get Dat Good Education. Everyone in the same group lives in the same dorm/boarding house/whatever.

Jungkook’s got his laptop open to his professor’s useless powerpoint, his textbook open to some useless page, and his chickenscratch notes open to – you guessed it, a useless page.

He leans back taking a deep breath of his pure black coffee. He’s a 3-in-1 kinda guy, as in three packets of instant coffee in one cup. It makes him feel alive.

Jungkook’s got his eyes shut. When everyone’s quiet like this, he can almost imagine he lives alone. Almost.

The door swings open.  “It’s two in the morning. Why are you still awake?” Jin asks, untying his boots before placing them gently on the shoe rack.

“No.” Yoongi mutters sleepily, from somewhere behind Jin. Yoongi kicks one shoe into one corner and the other underneath the shoe rack, then lumbers into the house.

“Isn’t your exam today? You should be getting some sleep,” Jin says, looking over Jungkook’s shoulder.

“I’ll sleep when I’m dead.” Jungkook says, taking a sip of coffee. He’s not about to admit that he fell asleep a while ago for six hours instead of studying.

“You’ll be dead soon if you keep finishing up my coffee.” Yoongi says, grabbing the three empty instant coffee sachets in a fist. “You little-”

“Hooookay,” Jin says, wrapping Yoongi in a tight backhug before he can attack Jungkook. “We’re going to bed now. Don’t sleep too late.”

Jin all but carries Yoongi up the stairs, the latter still muttering half-formed protests, while Jin reassures him that they can always buy more coffee.

 _We’re_ going to bed now. Jungkook cringes. He looks back at his laptop, which has fallen asleep. Maybe he should sleep too. He’ll just wing the exam.

 

“Goddamn. It.”

Jinyoung rubs his temples. He lives in a dormitory with a bunch of lowerclassmen, so he’s used to noise. He can sleep through almost anything at this point, but this is too much.

He slams the door to Yugyeom’s room open. Dumbass freshman didn’t even lock his door.

“Goddamn it Yugyeom either go the fuck to sleep or just pipe the fuck down!” Jinyoung spits out in one breath. In another life, he could have been a rapper.

“Hm?” Yugyeom looks up innocently from his bed from where he’s been bouncing a basketball against the wall between his and Jinyoung’s rooms.

“Goddamn-” Jinyoung storms over and grabs the basketball. “Look, I know you’re going through a messy breakup and shit-”

“ _What_?” Yugyeom laughs. “Breakup? What breakup?”

“God-” Jinyoung looks up, like he’s trying to find Jesus in Yugyeom’s waterstained ceiling. “God, please give the fucking patience to deal with this kid.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop.” Yugyeom takes the basketball back and places it on the ground. “You should go back to sleep, you look sleepy, hyung.”

Jinyoung swallows whatever he was going to snap back at Yugyeom and nods. “Lock your door if you don’t want any wild Bambams barging in-”

“Yeah, hyung. Got it.”

Jinyoung locks his own door and settles himself under his comforters. His eyelids are about to flutter shut when something bangs against his wall. It does it again, and again. Jinyoung claps his hands over his ears and takes a deep breath. He doesn’t have the energy to kill Yugyeom, but tomorrow…

_

Minghao frowns. He’s been trying to catch Mingyu’s attention for the past thirty minutes, but the other guy’s just been staring out the window, his chin resting his hands.

Min. Gyu. Look. Here. Minghao furrows his brow, glaring at Mingyu like he’s hoping he has some untapped telepathic powers.

“Eyes on your own paper.” The professor snaps from the front of the class.

Minghao looks down at his exam, which has been finished for the past hour. He even went over his answers for thirty minutes just because he was bored. Now he’s extremely bored, and the professor won’t let anyone submit their exam and leave early.

Mingyu yawns like a cat, not even bothering to cover his mouth. Has he even finished answering his exam? No, the essay’s still blank-

“Eyes on your own papers, everybody.”

Minghao pretends to yawn, turning his eyes away from Mingyu to the real problem. Sitting by the back row, hunched over his exam with his eyebrows scrunched underneath uncombed, unwashed hair, is Jungkook. Nobody sitting near him, probably because anyone with any sense can see that he’s sleep-deprived and pretty much rabid. Even the girl who usually sits next to him to bat her eyelashes at him (poor girl, she doesn’t know) is sitting somewhere near the front.

Minghao tries to signal Mingyu again.

“This is your last warning. Keep your eyes on your own paper, or I’m going to throw you out of the classroom.”

 _Go ahead_ , Minghao thinks, clicking his pen impatiently.

 

They’re used to eating lunch together in a giant huddle around this one stone table outside the college, but Jaehyun regrets sending a message to the group chat asking for them to meet up because he made some croquettes. Sure, everyone’s there, happily dipping the croquettes in ketchup and chewing pretty loudly, but all you can hear is the chewing. Bambam had tried to say something about this guy in his class who looks like a nose, but then Yugyeom said Bambam looks like a toe, and that was the end of that. Seokmin had started humming some song that always plays on the radio, but Jungkook popped his water bottle open loudly, and gulped down some water even louder, so Seokmin stopped humming.

“So…” Jaehyun says, watching Winwin attempt – and fail – to pick up a croquette with his chopsticks. “How was your exam awhile ago?”

There’s a long silence as Minghao and Mingyu keep giving Jaehyun warning looks over Jungkook’s and Yugyeom’s heads. The latter are busy eating, so busy they don’t even look up at anyone.

“The croquettes are really good.” Mingyu coughs, trying to talk with an entire croquette in his mouth.

“Thanks.” Jaehyun says.

Winwin manages to crush the croquette in half, but still pick up nothing. He looks helplessly at Jaehyun.

Jaehyun borrows Winwin’s spoon to plop the murdered croquette onto his plate.

There’s another long silence – it’s not really _silent_ because they’re outdoors and everyone’s chewing, but you get me.

“Are we still going out on Friday?” Bambam asks. “Like, _all_ of us or just…?”

Mingyu chokes on some rice, and Jaehyun pats him on the back a few times.

“Yeah, why not?” Jungkook says, crumpling his paper plate. He slams it into the trash bin as he leaves.

 

“Because,” Mingyu sighs. “We don’t even know why they broke up.”

He, Minghao, Bambam, and Seokmin are hitching a ride in Jaehyun’s car to their next class. Actually Jaehyun’s driving the long way around the school gym because they still haven’t come up with a plan to fix Jungkook and Yugyeom.

“Maybe the sex wasn’t good enough.” Bambam shrugs.

“ _Bam_.” Jaehyun says, shifting gears a bit too late.

“What?” Bambam shrugs harder. “Just because a guy has a big dick doesn’t mean-”

“I didn’t need to know that you know what Yugyeom’s dick looks like.” Minghao mutters.

“I wasn’t talking about Yugyeom.” Bambam says, waggling his eyebrows.

“But you don’t even live with Jungkook?” Seokmin’s eyes bug out at he tries to process what he’s heard.

“You don’t need to live with him to know-” Mingyu starts, but Jaehyun cuts in,

“ _Anyway_.” Jaehyun drives them around the gym’s parking lot a third time. “I don’t think we’ll ever know why they broke up, or that we should-”

“I still think it’s the sex.” Bambam shrugs.

“Makes sense.” Minghao says, frowning. “What if they suck, but not in a good way?”

“AYE! Nice one, bruh.” Bambam says, exchanging a very crisp high five with Minghao over Seokmin.

“Okay, no more talking about our friends’…unconfirmed sex lives.” Jaehyun pulls them into a parking slot. He’s had enough. “What are we going to do about them? We can’t just leave them like this, it’s just- It’s bad for everybody.”

“I still think we need to know why they broke up to get them back together.” Mingyu says.

“Okay,” Jaehyun says slowly. He’s not about to disagree, but… “How would we find that out? Neither of those guys likes to share anything.”

“Except bodily fluids.” Minghao says quietly.

“With each other.” Bambam adds.

“AYYYE!” Minghao and Bambam high-five over a still confused Seokmin.

“ _Guys_.” Jaehyun says through ground teeth. “Enough.”

“I could try talking to Jungkook. We have Calc together later.” Mingyu offers.

“Yeah, but how-?” Jaehyun starts, but Seokmin cuts in.

“How do you know what Jungkook’s dick looks like?” He asks Bambam. 

Jaehyun switches the car off. It’s not even mid-afternoon, and he’s exhausted.

 

Jungkook can see Mingyu making his way across the auditorium like he’s gonna ask Jungkook for money or something. He’s trying to weave around a group of girls talking about the homework, but they don’t make enough room for him, so Mingyu starts climbing over the seats, looking like a lanky stick insect making its way across a bush. He must have left his entire wallet at home. Jungkook grabs his pretty much empty bag and leaves out the back door before Mingyu can get to him.

Jungkook’s only taken about five steps as he puts his noise-cancelling headphones on, when someone runs right into him, knocking him back a step.

“Hey!” Jungkook slides his headphones off, ready to fight.

“H- Hey.”

Jungkook looks up. It’s Yugyeom, looking really pale. Jungkook wants to ask what’s up, but then again _he’s_ probably what’s up, so Jungkook just slides his headphones back on and goes around him.

“Wait-” Yugyeom says, but Jungkook doesn’t hear him. Yugyeom chews on his lip and watches his favorite person in the whole world go, avoiding everyone in the hallway like he’s allergic to them.

Yugyeom’s one of those people too now. He feels his heart sinking. It’s all his fault. He fucked up, big time. Why did he have to make such a mess?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YUGKOOK ANGST. YUGKOOK ANGST. SAY IT WITH ME. YUGKOOK ANGST. YUGKOOK ANGST.


	2. 1 week and 3 days post-breakup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to put some JJP, I was weak.

Jinyoung’s burshing his teeth in the common bathroom, listening to Yugyeom slam things around in one of the shower stalls. There’s only a shelf and a showerhead in there, he doesn’t really know what Yugyeom’s slamming around but it’s noisy. Jinyoung exchanges a glance through the mirror with Jaebum who’s brushing his teeth in the next sink.

Jaebum looks in the direction of Yugyeom’s shower door, lifts his eyebrows, then looks back at Jinyoung.

“Jawwow krugow whinging.” Jinyoung tries to reply.

“Wha?” Jaebum tries to ask.

Jinyoung takes his toothbrush out of his mouth. “Wai-” He spits into the sink and rinses his mouth.

“Jungkook broke up with him.” Jinyoung whispers.

“What? _Why_?” Jaebum looks just about ready to wring Jungkook’s tiny head off his shoulders. Jinyoung tries not to smile at the idea.

“I don’t know.” Jinyoung taps the water out of his toothbrush.

“He’s an idiot.” Jaebum says.

“Which one?” Jinyoung asks.

Jaebum’s expression afterwards is so confused that Jinyoung wishes he’d brought his phone with him to take a photo.

“You were like them too when you were younger.” Jinyoung presses a kiss into the side of Jaebum’s mouth, licking off some of his toothpaste.

Jaebum chortles, then spits all of his toothpaste gracelessly on top of the faucet.

“I- Uh- I-” He wipes his mouth off on his sleeve. “I’m not that old.”

“Sure.” Jinyoung smiles and kisses Jaebum on the mouth. He tastes like toothpaste, unsurprisingly. “Oh, can I borrow your charger, old man?”

“Yes.”

 

Mingyu checks his watch, then squints out into the street, jacket slung over one shoulder. This street is so full of neon lights at night that he can hardly make out people’s faces.

“He didn’t say he wasn’t coming?” Mingyu asks Bambam, trying not to sound too hopeful.

“He didn’t say anything, dude, he’s just been crying and shit.” Bambam squints at the street through his sunglasses.

“Has he really been crying?” Jaehyun asks.

“That or jacking off sadly.” Bambam wonders why he can’t see anything. “He’s been in his room all day.”

“Can you go just five minutes without bringing up anything dick-related?” Jaehyun asks.

“Can you?” Bambam asks.

“What?”

“Hey.” Jungkook flips the hood of his hoodie off as he walks up to them. He’s taken a shower, his hair is newly blow-dried, and he even smells faintly of flowers. Mingyu suddenly feels like praising the Lord, or whoever was responsible. Jin, probably. “What’s everyone waiting out here for? Did you guys not get a room?”

A taxi rolls up to them, and Yugyeom climbs out, his hair still damp. He’s taken a shower too, at long last. Mingyu _cannot_ believe these two.

 

They wait a couple minutes for the first available karaoke room, which looks like it was made for around four people. Seokmin ends up standing, which is all right considering he’s got one microphone to himself anyway. Bambam slides into Minghao’s lap before anyone can say anything – Not that anyone does – and Jaehyun and Mingyu kind of fold their shoulders against each other to make sure Jungkook and Yugyeom are sitting apart.

The evening’s not as disastrous as anyone expected it to be, mostly because Bambam ordered enough beer for fifty people. Mingyu and Jaehyun exchange looks, or at least they look generally in each other’s direction before taking their twelveteenth bottle each, ready to not have to deal with their two friends who’ve been nursing the same lukewarm bottles of beer all evening. Minghao, already finding it hard to determine left from right from up from down, manages to pull another bottle away from Bambam, who’s had around twenteen bottles.

Seokmin’s lying on the floor, singing an old love song by heart, because he’s way past being able to read at this point. Not that it matters. He hasn’t selected a song in the karaoke in over an hour.

There’s a buzzing noise bothering Jaehyun, and he tries to swat it away.

“Sir, we’re _closing._ Now.”

Jaehyun laughs. “Sure.”

The door closes behind the buzzing.

 

“Okay, that’s everyone.” Yugyeom says. He tucks Minghao’s arm into the van before slamming the door.

“Ok.”

 Jungkook’s swinging his keys – no, the keys to Jin’s van – around his finger.

“Ok.”

Yugyeom stuffs his hands into his pockets. It’s a bit cold.

“Ok.”

Jungkook opens the door to the driver’s side.

“Ok.”

Yugyeom starts walking down the street.

“Are you drunk?” Jungkook says, catching him by the arm. “Get in the car.”

“I was going to take a taxi.” Yugyeom says.

“Why? I’m taking Bambam to your dorm anyway. You’re just going to waste money.”

“It’s not your money, why do you care? Maybe I want to ride a taxi.”

“What the hell are you saying? Who _wants_ to ride a taxi?”

“Maybe I do, you don’t know-”

“This is why you shouldn’t drink so much, you always end up saying all kinds of-”

“I had _one_ beer, and I’m not dru-”

“You’re a lightweight, Gyeommie, you’re practically a feather-”

“Who the fuck are you calling lightweight, you fucking-”

“Don’t fucking shout at me just because you’re-”

“I’m not drunk!” Yugyeom huffs, a cloud condensing around his mouth. “You’re just pissing me off.”

“ _I’m_ pissing _you_ off? I’m not the one who-” Jungkook takes a few deep breaths, counting in his head so hard you can see it on his face. “Just get in the goddamn car.”

“Fine!” Yugyeom slams the passenger door behind him. He folds his arms.

Jungkook shouts into the street, scaring a stray cat out of the garbage, before getting into the van.

“Put on your seatbelt.” He says.

“I don’t want to.” Yugyeom folds his arms tighter.

“Put on your goddamned seatbelt or I’ll-”

“Or you’ll _what_?” Yugyeom says.

Jungkook actually, honest-to-goodness growls as he reaches over and clips Yugyeom’s seatbelt over his folded arms.

“I already said I was sorry. Why do you have to be like this?” Jungkook clenches his teeth as he starts the car.

Yugyeom doesn’t answer. He doesn’t trust himself to say anything he won’t regret in the morning, so he doesn’t say anything. He keeps his arms folded under the seatbelt.

 

“Hey, Gyeommie…” Yugyeom wakes up to someone gently shaking his arm, which has fallen slack but is still tucked under the seatbelt. He blinks at the bright light right in front of the car. It’s the light outside his dormitory.

“Wake up.” Jungkook says gruffly, pulling his hand back. “I’ve already carried Bambam to his room and you’re too heavy-”

“I’m awake.” Yugyeom undoes his seatbelt and steps out of the van. He tries to slam the door, but he’s too sleepy. The door swings lamely into its socket.

Jungkook reaches out, opens the door again, and slams it shut for good measure. He drives off, leaving Yugyeom blinking in the dormitory’s fog light.

“Drive safe.” Yugyeom yawns, turning to go into the dorm.

 

Jungkook lies awake, staring at his ceiling. There are a bunch of squares where the paint has been ripped off, because he’d tried to put up posters when he’d first moved in. Yugyeom said the posters made him look like a loser, so he took them down.

He’s not going to close his eyes, because every time he does he sees Yugyeom fast asleep, his long black eyelashes brushing the tops of his cheeks. There’s that cute mole right under his eye – Jungkook couldn’t see it in the dark, but he knew it was there. Like how he knew that Yugyeom was asleep, even if he didn’t slide or slouch.

Jungkook rolls over and faces the wall. He, Jungkook, carried exactly five grown men tonight, and he’s exhausted. Screw Yugyeom, he’s going to get some sleep.

When he closes his eyes, he sees Yugyeom shifting his sleep, but he isn’t sitting in the passenger’s seat, he’s lying on the floor beside him.

 

_“Hey, Gyeommie…” Jungkook shakes Yugyeom’s arm gently. “Wake up, Gyeommie.”_

_“Ngkrgh.” Yugyeom grunts. They’re lying on the rug below Jungkook’s bed, the PS4 still whirring though the monitor’s fallen asleep too. It’d been early afternoon when Yugyeom had come over to play a game he could definitely have played at home, but now it was dark, Jungkook was cold, and his arm was all pins and needles._

_Jungkook snorts, shaking Yugyeom’s arm harder. “Gyeomieeeeee, wake uuuup.” He whines._

_“What.” Yugyeom grumbles, turning to place his face just a few inches away from Jungkook’s._

_“My arm’s asleep.” Jungkook whines, shaking his arm from under Yugyeom’s head._

_“Your arm can take it.” Yugyeom pats Jungkook’s bicep and snuggles in closer._

_“Gyeommieeeeeeeeeee…”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The game was Overwatch. JOKE everyone knows Jungkook’s ass plays OW on the pc he’s even got the dank gamer chair thing.


	3. 2 weeks post-breakup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mingyu & Minghao are on detective mode now

Mingyu stops taking notes and stretches, leaning surreptitiously over to Jungkook, who’s on his phone. The professor in front is droning on and on about integrals, and couldn’t care less about his students, who are still stuck on derivatives at this point.

“Let’s have lunch together,” Mingyu says.

“We always have lunch together.” Jungkook mumbles, scrolling aimlessly up messages in some group chat Mingyu’s not part of.

“I mean just you and me.” Mingyu says.

“Why?” Jungkook frowns, but keeps scrolling.

“I just wanted to hang out with you and talk about, you know, what’s been going on with you.”

“We see each other every day. Nothing’s been going on with me.” Jungkook doesn’t look up from his phone.

“Well, uh,” Mingyu’s starting to sweat. He can play it cool. He’s the king of playing it cool. “Have you watched the new Game of Thrones episode?”

“I don’t watch that.”

Mingyu picks his ballpen up in defeat and goes back to drawing the squiggle integral symbol in the margins of his notebook.

“My treat.” Mingyu says finally, in an act of desperation. “I’ll pay for lunch.”

“Ok.” Jungkook says, opening another group chat.

 

Minghao takes the seat next to Yugyeom, and shoots an aggressive look at the guy who was about to sit there. Said guy has no intentions of dying, so he just puts his hands up in surrender and sits elsewhere.

“Yugyeom.”

“Yeah?” Yugyeom asks, pulling out his phone. He and Minghao never take notes in their History class – it’s useless, the professor changes the slide every 0.05 seconds – so they just take photos of the lecture slides and read them later. Or, at least, Minghao does.

“Why’d you break up with Jungkook?”

Yugyeom starts rubbing a nonexistent speck on his phone screen. “I didn’t break up with Jungkook.”

Minghao gives him a look that says, _Are you for fucking serious right now?_

“We were never dating.” Yugyeom keeps scratching at his phone screen. “How could he break up with me?”

Minghao frowns. “He broke up with you?”

“We’re not like that.” Yugyeom manages to laugh awkwardly. “We’re just bros.”

“Like how Jinyoung-hyung and Jaebum-hyung are bros?” Minghao asks.

“No.” Yugyeom smacks his phone down onto his desk. “You can’t just go around assuming everyone’s gay like you, Minghao.”

“I’m bi, but I’ll let that slide because you’re going through some tough shit right now.”

“I’m _not_.” Yugyeom grumbles, going back to scratching at his phone screen, but Minghao can see he’s blinking rapidly, like he’s cutting onions. Minghao gives himself a high-five in his mind. He’s so good at this.

 

“I got nothing out of Jungkook, and now I’m 50,000 won poorer.” Mingyu says, sliding into the passenger’s seat of Jaehyun’s car. “I have a net loss of 50,000 won.”

“ _Net loss_? What the fuck? You sound like an adult, man.” Bambam pipes up from where he’s lying in the third row.

“Sorry. That business class really gets into my head.” Mingyu shudders.

“I was gonna give you a prize, but I guess I’m just going to keep it.” Jaehyun reaches into the glove compartment and pulls out a roll of kimbap. Mingyu pouts at it as Jaehyun unwraps the top and takes a huge bite.

The back door opens, and Minghao and Seokmin climb in.

“You wouldn’t believe what Minghao found out.” Seokmin says, in his best TV announcer voice.

“What?” Jaehyun and Mingyu ask, the latter perching on the armrest to listen better.

“Jungkook broke up with Yugyeom. Two weeks ago.” Minghao says, extending a hand. “Kimbap, please.”

Jaehyun reaches into the glove compartment for another roll and hands it to Minghao, who gives Mingyu a smug look before unwrapping it.

“But I could’ve told you that!” Mingyu protests. “Everyone knows Jungkook would dump Yugyeom and not the other way arou-”

“That’s not all.” Minghao cuts him off. He turns to Bambam. “It wasn’t crappy sex, you owe me 100,000 won.”

“Fucking shit.” Bambam mutters, still lying down in the third row. He kicks the wall, shaking the entire car.

“Hey!” Jaehyun snaps, his mouth still half full of kimbap.

“Yugyeom tried to kiss Jungkook and he chickened out and said he has to go home and he didn’t answer any of Yugyeom’s messages afterward.” Minghao says.

“Over a _kiss_?” Mingyu asks.

“Weak shit.” Jaehyun takes another bite of kimbap.

“Well that’s what I think happened,” Minghao takes a bite of his kimbap. “I’m just trying to piece it together from the little Yugyeom told me.”

“Wait, so what _did_ he tell you?” Mingyu asks, narrowing his eyes.

“That he and Jungkook weren’t dating and they’re best friends and they’re not g-”

“You _scammer_!” Jaehyun says, grabbing the kimbap out of Minghao’s hand. Mingyu tries to make a go for it, but Jaehyun’s faster. “We thought you were being legit!”

“I was.” Minghao tries to get his kimbap back. “It doesn’t take a genius to figure out what happened there.”

“Wait…so nothing you told me awhile ago was true?” Seokmin asks.

“It’s all _probably_ true. Didn’t I say that? Oh well.” Minghao shrugs.

“SCAMMER!” Mingyu tries to slap Minghao’s knee or whatever he can reach, but Minghao slips out of the way and Seokmin gets hit.

“Ow! Your hands are _heavy_!”

“You owe me 100,000 won, man.” Bambam mutters from the back row.

“No, because you said it was the sex thing and we don’t know if it’s the sex thing, so I don’t owe you shit.” Minghao says.

“Unfair.”

“Can’t I have kimbap? Minghao didn’t find anything out and he got a bite.” Mingyu pouts at Jaehyun, who holds fast to his two rolls of kimbap.

“Nobody gets kimbap except me, because we haven’t even fucking found the first thing about why the fuck Jungkook broke up with Yugyeom!” Jaehyun spits out in one breath, before taking a bite of both rolls at once, or at least, trying to.

 

Jinyoung’s trying to focus on the laptop screen in front of him, but Yugyeom’s home. He knows without having to check the next room, because every day for the past two weeks, Yugyeom’s been bouncing that godforsaken basketball against the wall like _BLAG, BLAG, BLAG, BLAG…_

Jinyoung slams the space bar, pausing the movie. He throws off the covers, tossing the laptop the to foot of the bed, and gets up. Jaebum blinks awake from where he’s been lying on the bed beside him.

“Is the movie done?” Jaebum asks.

“How can you sleep?” Jinyoung tugs at his hair. “Yugyeom’s so fucking noisy.”

_BLAG, BLAG, BLAG…_

“Leave him alone. He’s going through some-”

“He can go through his shit quietly!” Jinyoung says, almost shouting.

_BLAG, BLAG._

Jinyoung looks at the wall between their rooms, like he’s trying to see through it to check whether Yugyeom had stopped because he’d heard him.

“You should go apologize to the poor kid.” Jaebum whispers.

“ _He_ ’s the one who should be apologizing, he’s a fucking menace.” Jinyoung says, but his stomach’s starting to feel a bit weird. Guilt. It’s guilt.

Jaebum rolls off the bed. “I’m gonna go talk to him.”

“Yeah, you should probably do it.” Jinyoung says sitting on the edge of the bed. He watches Jaebum close the door quietly behind himself, then flops onto the rumpled covers, and his laptop.

He hears Jaebum’s voice through the wall, quiet and muffled, and then he hears Yugyeom’s much squeakier voice, even quieter and more muffled. After a quick, muffled conversation, Jinyoung’s door opens again.

“Okay, he said he’s sorry and he’s not gonna bother you anymore.” Jaebum whispers, closing the door really slowly so as not to make any noise.

Jinyoung sighs and rolls over to one side of the bed to give Jaebum some space. “We should kill that Jungkook kid.”

“Yeah.” Jabeum rests back on the pillows slowly, like he’s still trying not to make any noise.

“ _You hold him and I punch_.” Jinyoung says, in a vague approximation of Mulan’s voice. He rests his head on Jaebum’s thigh and looks up at his boyfriend, who’s already dozing off. “Hey, old man. I made a joke. Laugh.”

“Mm-hm.” Jaebum says, dropping off.

 

Yugyeom reaches across the floor of his room to where his phone is charging in the wall socket. Nothing’s changed. He switches his cellular data off and on again, and nothing changes.

_1 new message from Kookie_. Yugyeom yanks his phone out of the charger and holds it close to his face to read the message.

> _Kookie: What the hell did you tell the others about us?_

Yugyeom rolls his eyes.

> _Gyeommie: Nothing. What the hell are they saying?_
> 
> _Kookie: Mingyu keeps fucking asking me why you broke up with me is he stoned?_
> 
> _Gyeommie: Maybe. Bambam was def stoned awhile ago._
> 
> _Kookie: What a fucking mess_
> 
> _Gyeommie: It’s Bambam what do you expect_
> 
> _Kookie: Yeah. Right._

Yugyeom watches the ellipses appear on Jungkook’s side of the chat and disappear. They appear again briefly, then disappear.

Yugyeom types, _So did the girl from last Friday ever reply?_ then deletes it all. He doesn’t want to know. What’s wrong with him.

 

Jungkook’s hitting the backspace furiously, deleting his, _You busy? Let’s hang out._

Some guy twice his size taps him on the shoulder. “You still using this, or are you just gonna text here all day?”

Jungkook looks back at the bench he’s sitting on, where he was supposedly lifting weights. Fucking Yugyeom. Always getting him in trouble.

“I’m done.” Jungkook snarls, picking up his water bottle and storming off.

He types, _I didn’t talk to her again._

He sucks on the inside of his cheek before adding, _Just in case you wanted to know._

No, Jungkook thinks, deleting everything before he accidentally sends that goddamn message. Why would Yugyeom even want to know that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just for closure purposes, yes Jinyoung & Jaebum fuck once old man Jaebum is done with his nap. D u h.
> 
> Also yes, Jungkook & Yugyeom have baby nicknames on their chat. It’s a straight boy best friends thing to do, the gays best friends are all Bitch #1, Bitch #2, Bitch #3… Just kidding they’re gay too, they’re just cute like that.


	4. The night of the breakup

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What?? We’ve gone bAcK iN TiMe?? But--??? 
> 
> Hahhahahahahahahaha

_Solid 8/10_ , Yugyeom thinks, as this girl comes up to their corner. He swirls the beer in the bottle in his hand. _Probably a 9 without this much makeup._

He and Jungkook are at a party because Bambam insisted he didn’t want to go alone and there would be lots of hot girls there, but it’s been three hours and they haven’t seen Bambam _once_. There were a lot of hot girls, though. Like this one.

She doesn’t even glance at Yugyeom and goes straight for Jungkook. Yugyeom rolls his eyes. He could be ten feet tall and girls will still see Jungkook first. He should probably stop ignoring Jungkook’s invitations to the gym. But working out is so _tiring_.

Yugyeom drains his beer. “I’m gonna go get another beer.”

“Kay.” Jungkook says, turning back to the girl who’s laughing at some joke he made. It didn’t make any sense to Yugyeom, but if that’s what girls want then that’s why he’s not getting them.

Yugyeom asks a bunch of vaguely familiar people if they’ve seen Bambam, but they all either shrug or say “What the hell is a Bambam?”

“Jackson! Hey!” Yugyeom tries to catch the attention of the shirtless guy hanging from the ceiling, shouting something about women’s rights to the ceiling fan.

“...JUST ‘CAUSE THEY’RE GETTING PAID, DOESN’T MEAN WE DON’T GET PAID TOO, FAM!” Jackson shouts. “THA’S WHY IT’S CALLED EQUAL. EQUAL PAY. EQUAL RIGHTS.”

“Jackson!” Yugyeom considers his options, then tugs on the edge of Jackson’s jeans. “Hey! Jackson!”

“Oh they there little guy,” says Jackson, who stands almost a foot shorter than Yugyeom. When he’s on the ground, at least. “What’re you doing here?”

“Have you seen Bam?”

“He’s not coming. Said he had a family thing.” Jackson tries to shrug while still hanging from the ceiling. It’s difficult, but his muscles come through.

“Fuck Bambam.” Yugyeom grumbles. He tried being a good friend for once, and now he’s stuck at a party with Jackson and a whole shit ton of people he doesn’t care about. He pulls out his phone.

 

Jungkook had forgotten how nice it was to make out with someone, if you’d believe it. He hadn’t found a single girl worth his time in the past year, and he’d stopped missing it altogether.

_This girl’s kind of skinny, but eh, not so bad_ , he thinks, as she grinds roughly into his lap. Her knees are poking his sides and she doesn’t have much of an ass to cushion herself against his thighs, so Jungkook’s thinking they’re both going to be bruised in the morning if she keeps going like this. He’s sitting on an end table, his back knocking against the wall, but the girl just keeps trying to fuck him through their jeans.

“You can take them off, you know,” Jungkook suggests, pulling away from her mouth for a second.

The girl blushes. “What’re you talking about?”

“Our pants. Just take them off.” Jungkook says. “It’ll be easier for everybody.”

“You really think,” The girl says in this sing-song voice, slowing down as she presses her entire body against Jungkook’s. “I’m going to let you fuck me without even _one_ date?”

Jungkook realizes that her boobs are surprisingly big, now that they’re flush against his chest. He frowns. “You’re the one who was trying to- Whatever.”

“ _I’m_ the one who was trying to? You wish.” The girl says, with a really annoying chuckle. She’s officially dropped to a 7/10 on Jungkook and Yugyeom’s scale. Jungkook frowns deeper. Where did Yugyeom head off to anyway?

“Look, I don’t do dates. I don’t have time, and I don’t want to just let somebody down.” Jungkook says. “But if you wanna fuck, I’m okay with it.”

Jungkook knows he could do worse. At least he can distract himself with her great boobs while she makes more annoying noises.

“That’s not very romantic,” The girl says, slowly, gliding her hands down Jungkook’s shirt. “But I’ll take it.”

_What kind of bullshit is she talking about now?_ Jungkook takes a deep breath.

“Are you nervous?” She asks, chuckling. Jungkook shoves his tongue into her mouth to stop that irritating noise.

“No.” He says, gasping for breath. He overdid it a little, and now he knows that she had some of the pepperoni pizza. “Should I be?”

The girl chuckles again in reply. Jungkook prays to God that she doesn’t make that sound while they’re having sex, because nothing is more of a bonerkill than- Jungkook takes a quick moment to ask God for forgiveness because he’s about to have sex with this girl he doesn’t give two fucks about. He’d already said sorry about not waiting for marriage a couple years back.

“You don’t wanna go somewhere more, I dunno, not in the middle of the party?” Jungkook asks, as the girl’s unbuttoning his jeans.

The girl chuckles. “Isn’t it kind of exciting? We won’t get caught, don’t worry.”

Jungkook looks around as the girl takes his entire dick in her mouth. The other people at this party couldn’t care less about what was happening in the corner. He wasn’t afraid of judged for fucking someone out here in the open, he was afraid of someone he knows seeing him with _this_ girl in particular.

Jungkook’s having an okay time while the girl sucks him off, because her mouth is too busy to make strange sounds or say any more bullshit about romance or excitement or whatever she was saying.

He leans against the wall and sighs as he feels himself just begin to get hard. This girl sucks at sucking. _He_ could do a better job, but he just physically can’t. And he doesn’t want to blow himself. That’d be weird.

A buzz in his pocket snaps him back to reality, where the girl’s taken Jungkook’s hands and slid them under her shirt and bra. Jungkook grabs her boobs almost desperately, disappointed to find that they were just regular underneath a lot of really good padding.

“Gimme a sec.” Jungkook slides one of his hands out and checks his phone, while the girl does _not_ give him a second, because she’s out there giving him hickeys all the way up his neck.

> _Gyeommie: Bam’s not here. Let’s go._

Jungkook takes a while to type with one hand, the other one half-assedly massaging this girl’s boob.

> _Kookie: Go ahead._
> 
> _Gyeommie: What the fuck, man?_

Jungkook almost slaps himself on the forehead. Right. Yugyeom was gonna hitch a ride home with him. Yugyeom hates the smell of taxis and having to talk to the taxi drivers.

> _Gyeommie: Let’s gooooooooooooooooo_

Jungkook looks back at the girl, who’s kicked her jeans to the floor. She’s currently making a show of sliding her panties off, and Jungkook grabs her hands. “Hold up. Do you have a condom?”

The girl looks at him like he’s speaking another language. “You can just pull out…?”

Jungkook’s not about to get into a debate with her over how much pulling out does _not_ work and how much he does _not_ want to become a father right now, so he lets her ride him. Whatever. It’s her fault if something or someone happens.

The girl’s making these annoying whiny-laugh noises as she bounces up and down, and Jungkook’s feeling too good to mind them. He can almost tune out her voice at this point, and imagine he’s somewhere else entirely, fucking someone else entirely.

 

Yugyeom knocks down another bottle of beer, staring at his phone. He’s sent Jungkook about a hundred messages asking him what could be so interesting that he’s going to leave Yugyeom hanging here (actually it’s only been thirty messages).

“Woah, little guy, slow down,” Jackson says, clapping Yugyeom on the back so hard the latter throws up in his mouth a little. “What’s up?”

Yugyeom, against his own principles, swallows it back down. “Stupid goddamn best friend won’t fucking reply to me and I want to go home.” He says, shaking his phone.

“He’s probably passed out somewhere, man, just look for him.”

Yugyeom groans and rolls his eyes. Jackson knows better than to say anything more when Yugyeom’s brought out the eye-roll-groan combo.

“He’s not supposed to have more than one beer ‘cause he’s driving.” Yugyeom slams his bottle onto the table in front of him. “Fucking idiot.”

“I’d offer you a ride, but I don’t think I’ll find my way back to the dorm tonight. Or tomorrow.” Jackson shrugs. “I’ll see you around, I guess.”

Yugyeom picks up his jacket, kicking his chair back as he gets up. He’s too drunk and tired and he has to go home now.

Yugyeom hunts all around this house again – Why the hell is it so big and why are there so many damn people? – before he gives up and heads out. The air is cold, but he doesn’t notice because his face is flushed from the twenty? Twenty-one bottles of beer?

Yugyeom gets so angry he feels like there’s steam coming off his face when he stops in front of Jungkook’s – no, Jin’s parked car and finds it bouncing.

He pulls the passenger door open. Son of a bitch didn’t even lock the door.

The girl from awhile ago scrambles to try to cover herself, but Jungkook just leans back in the reclined driver’s seat, his legs spread unapologetically as he squints in Yugyeom’s direction. “Gyeommie?”

“What the fuck, man?” Yugyeom shouts, and he’s not sure if it’s because of the alcohol but he’s really, really, really angry.

“Shit, are you drunk?” Jungkook asks, leaning to look at Yugyeom’s red face, leaving the naked girl in his lap to adjust, moaning.

“I’m nearly there, baby,” The girl whines.

Yugyeom rolls his eyes. “Yeah I’m drunk what was I supposed to do while you were out here fucking some random bitch you don’t even know the name of?”

“I’m not gonna marry her, Gyeommie, I don’t need to know her damn name,” Jungkook grumbles, accidentally thrusting up into the girl, who moans harder.

“Oh, baby, pl-”

“Shut up!” Yugyeom slams a fist into the car’s roof. “Why the hell are you still here? Kook, let’s go home.”

“Why the hell are _you_ still here? Can’t you let us finish?” Jungkook tries to wave Yugyeom away, but Yugyeom smacks his hand.

“Don’t you fucking shoo me.” Yugyeom snarls. “I’m going to take a taxi.”

Jungkook sighs, but not that kind of sigh.

“Come on Gyeommie, just give me like five minutes. I’ll be fast. Promise.” Jungkook looks up pleadingly, and Yugyeom doesn’t know why but he’s just so angry at Jungkook and his big watery eyes. He doesn’t give a shit about the girl in Jungkook’s lap, he isn’t even mad at her. It’s just Jungkook.

“You could do better.” Yugyeom says, as loudly as he can, practically into the girl’s ear, and he knows as he’s doing it that it’s too much hate towards this girl he doesn’t even care about enough to hate. He slams the door and heads down the street, stomping like he’s trying to leave footprints in the concrete. He tries to control his breathing, but he’s angry and drunk and now he’s crying.

Jungkook could do way better.

Yugyeom hails a taxi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHAT JUNGKOOK DID WAS WRONG. LETTING YUGYEOM TAKE A TAXI HOME WAS ALSO WRONG, BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY PLEASE USE CONDOMS. FOR THE GOOD OF EVERYONE. THIS HAS BEEN A PSA BY YOUR FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD SEX-POSITIVE NOONA. #ProteccBeforeYouAttacc
> 
> I know it’s a bit mean not to name this poor girl with an annoying laugh, but she’s an ode to those xreaders/self-insert OCs who make me so angry and cringe so hard I feel alive. She’s not any idol and I hope she doesn’t exist in the real life, but if she does I hope she’s with someone who treasures her and her annoying voice, unlike Jungkook.


	5. 3 weeks post-breakup

“Have you guys talked about it?” Mingyu asks, twirling a ball of spaghetti the size of a baseball around his fork.

“How many times do I have to tell you this? We’re. Fine.” Jungkook gives up on his spaghetti and starts chopping it up. He wasn’t going to waste a single strand. This was free food. “We weren’t dating, and we didn’t break up, and you don’t have to keep looking at me that way- I told you, we’re fine.”

“We’re just taking a break from each other.” Jungkook adds.

Mingyu drinks his water in accusing silence.

“It’s not like that! He’s just pissed off at me right now, he has the right to be, and it’s gonna blow over in a few days. Watch.”

“It’s been weeks.” Mingyu notes, before drinking more water accusingly.

“Well, a few _more_ days, then. Yugyeom can be such a moody bitch sometimes.” Jungkook mutters.

“So are you.”

Jungkook spits an entire mouthful of spaghetti back onto his plate, and looks up to find Yugyeom standing by their table with his arms folded. He’s got his backpack on, like he’d just come from the university.

“Heeey,” Jungkook says, slowly.

“Hi Mingyu.” Yugyeom smiles at Mingyu, whose hands are shaking as he puts his fork down.

“It’s not what you think.” Mingyu says, his face going a little pale. “We’re not on a date. I’d never-”

“Of _course_ we’re not, what the fuck, Gyu?” Jungkook makes a face in Mingyu’s direction, but the latter is still looking up fearfully in Yugyeom’s direction. “He’s buying me dinner.”

“Oh, cool.” Yugyeom nods.

“It’s not like that!” Mingyu waves his hands aggressively, like he’s trying to fan out a fire. “He’s just feeling bad because you’re feeling bad and I felt that I-”

“Yo. Mingyu. Calm the fuck down.” Yugyeom says. “I was just saying hi. You can date Jungkook if you want to.”

“I’m really not! I swear!” Mingyu insists.

“We’re not on a date,” Jungkook insists.

“He always has sex on the first date though, if you’re ready for that.” Yugyeom shoots Mingyu a wink before turning to go.

“I’M NOT GAY!” Jungkook growls, and everyone in the restaurant turns to him. He looks down at his lap, blushing right to his ears. “Not that there’s anything wrong with being gay some of my best friends are gay…”

 

Yugyeom feels like he’s walking on sunshine. He dances into the burger joint he’s taken up a part-time job at, and gives his coworkers a smile. The two girls laugh.

“Someone’s happy today.” Eunha says, waggling her eyebrows at Yuju.

“I’m gay.” Yugyeom says brightly.

“Uh, congrats?” Yuju says.

“I’m in love with my best friend who is _so_ not into men and that’s what’s been bothering me for _years_ so now that I know what my problem is…” Yugyeom’s smile falters. “I know what my problem is.”

Yugyeom throws his backpack into his cubby. He then sticks his head into Eunha’s cubby and shouts, “I hate my life!”

Yuju backs out of the backroom, putting her hands up as though she’s trying to say, _This one’s all yours._

“Woah, woah, woah,” Eunha says, patting Yugyeom on the back. “You’re gonna scare off all the customers. Then we won’t earn shit.”

“Fuck the money, Eunha, I’m in love with someone who doesn’t love me back.” Yugyeom sobs into Eunha’s backpack.

“ _Fuck the money_? _Fuck? The? Money???_ What happened to the Yugyeom I know and love whose only goal is to get so rich he can retire at 30 and never have to work a day in his life ever again?” Eunha says, rubbing Yugyeom’s back.

“That Yugyeom wants to marry his best friend so he never has to work a day in his life ever again.” Yugyeom says. “Kookie would never let me go hungry. If he loved me back. Why do I have to be in love with someone who won’t love me back?”

“This is really sad and all,” Eunha says, reaching into the shelves by the cubbies. She holds out an apron. “But you have to go flip some burgers now. You’ll have all the time in the world to cry about your best friend later.”

“Bitch.” Yugyeom sniffles, snatching the apron from her.

 

Jaehyun reaches into his glove compartment and pulls out five rolls of kimbap. “Everybody get one.”

Minghao, Seokmin, and Bambam reach out and grab one roll each, but Mingyu hesitates. “What are we celebrating?” He asks.

“That you totally screwed up any chances of us fixing Yugyeom and Jungkook’s relationship.” Jaehyun smiles, handing him a foil-wrapped roll.

“What?”

“Congratulations on your new boyfriend!” Seokmin taps his roll against Mingyu’s in a kind of toast.

“Let us know if he’s really bad in bed.” Minghao says.

“We’ve still got that bed bet. Bet. Bed. Get it?” Bambam rips the foil off his kimbap. “AYOOOoo!”

“I…” Mingyu unwraps his kimbap slowly, frowning. “I’m not dating Jungkook, I swear!”

“ _Sure_.” Jaehyun chuckles. “And I’m not sleeping with Lee Taeyong.”

“Wait…” Seokmin stops in mid-bite. “You are?”

“Ayyeee, Jaehyun’s sleeping with a seniorrr,” Bambam shakes Jaehyun’s seat. “Mmm dat hyung action.”

“Ayyyeee,” Minghao seconds, giving Jaehyun an OK symbol with his fingers. “Nice one, man. NIce.”

“NI-ICE!” Seokmin shouts, and it echoes in the enclosed car.

“But I’m really not dating Jungkook!” Mingyu says. “I’m trying to help!”

“We’re not talking about you anymore, dude, we’re talking about Jaehyun and how much gAME HE HAS AYYYEEE!!” Bambam high fives Jaehyun, then Seokmin, then Minghao.

“Your ‘helping’ is really not helping.” Minghao shrugs, accepting one of Bambam’s second round of high fives.

 

Jungkook gives up, because he can’t even focus on working out. The more he tries not to think about Yugyeom, the more of his brain he takes up. Jungkook literally throws a towel in, and takes a shower after fifteen minutes of not working out. He heads back to his boarding house to find the other boys eating dinner, laughing about something Hoseok had said.

“Have you had dinner?” Namjoon asks, catching Jungkook before he’s able to run past them and up the stairs.

“No.”

“Come eat with us,” Taehyung says, waving a hand over.

“No.”

“Come on, you just came from the gym, you need to replenish your calories,” Jin says.

“Is that what all the nutrition students call it? _Replenishing your calories_?” Yoongi snorts.

Jin blushes as the other boys laugh.

“Welcome to McDonalds, how may we replenish your calories today?” Hoseok goes, in his best imitation of a fast food cashier.

“Son, if you don’t replenish all your calories, you don’t get to play with your toys!” Namjoon says, in his best impression of an angry mother. It’s borderline offensive. He sounds like a bad drag queen.

“Ey bro, where are we gonna replenish our calories today?” Taehyung says, nudging Jimin with his elbow. Jimin’s laughing too hard to come up with anything of his own, and his face is almost as red as Jin’s.

“Stop it!” Jin says, covering his face. “I get it!”

“Hey. Jungkook. Replenish your calories with us,” Yoongi kicks out a chair for Jungkook.

Jungkook drops his gym bag and digs in. He almost forgets to obsess over Yugyeom while he eats, but then he realizes that congratulating himself for not thinking about his best friend is still thinking about his best friend.

 

              _Gyeommie: Are you busyyyyy_

Jungkook pulls his hand out of his shorts. He wipes his hand off on the covers before picking up his phone.

              _Kookie: No. Why?_

He lies there waiting while Yugyeom types a reply, itching to touch himself again because nobody else would. Or maybe some other noisy girl would, but he doesn’t want them to.

              _Gyeommie: Let’s hang outttt_

Jungkook frowns.

              _Kookie: Are you drunk?_

It takes a while for Yugyeom to reply, so Jungkook’s hand is back in his shorts when his phone buzzes again.

              _Gyeommie: Y_

_Kookie: Y as in yes or Y as in y do u ask?_

_Gyeommie: hhahahahhahhhhhh_

_Gyeommie: yes_

Jungkook frowns at his phone. Why wasn’t he invited to drink? Did they all go out without him? Do all his friends hate him too now?

              _Kookie: Where are you?_

Jungkook’s waiting so intently for Yugyeom’s ellipsis to become a message that he forgets he’d been jacking off.

              _Gyeommie: Dunnoooo_

              _Kookie: Ffs Gyeommie were the fuck are you?_

_Kookie: *where_

_Kookie: Whatever your drunk you don’t care about spelling_

_Kookie: *YOU’RE_

_Kookie: Yugyeom answer me where the hell are you don’t be like this_

_Kookie: KIM YUGYEOM_

_Gyeommie_ : ;) ;) ;)

“For fuck’s sake.” Jungkook says out loud. He gets up and throws his shorts off, changing into jeans.

Jin and Namjoon are still washing the dishes when he comes barreling down the stairs.

“Are you here to help us?” Jin asks, his eyes full of hope.

“Can I borrow your car, hyung?”

Jin rolls his eyes. All hope is gone. “The last time I let you borrow it you brought it back full of vomit.”

“The time before that the driver’s seat was full of…er…” Namjoon makes a gesture that it would be best not to describe.

Jungkook makes a face. “It’s an emergency, hyung.”

“It’s _always_ an emergency.” Jin says.

“Yugyeom’s drunk and I don’t know where he is I need to find him can I borrow the car?” Jungkook says, all in one breath.

Jin puts down a plate. “Why didn’t you just say so? The keys are in my left pocket I can’t get it, my hands are all soapy.”

“Thanks, hyung!” Jungkook grabs them as quickly as he can and runs out the door.

 

Jungkook tries to call Yugyeom again, but that idiot keeps hanging up. The third time, someone picks up, but it’s not Yugyeom.

“Hi, Kookie?” A girl asks. Her speech is a little slurred, but her voice is breathy and pleasant. Jungkook doesn’t care about her, though.

“Where’s Yugyeom?”

“He’s here.”

Jungkook wants to reach into the phone and slap this girl. He tries calming himself down, but it’s useless, so he just gives up. “Give him the damn phone.”

“Uh, okay, calm the tits, sir, but yeah, that’s…that’s not gonna happen.”

“Where the fuck is he?”

“Vomiting. Again. Oh shit.” The girl’s voice gets fainter, like she’s put the phone down somewhere. “You okay, Gyeommie?”

Jungkook frowns. He doesn’t like the way she says his name.

“Mmnn rgrgl okay.” Yugyeom’s voice is faint, but unmistakable.

“KIM YUGYEOM!” Jungkook roars into his phone. “WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?”

“Kookie?”

Jungkook can hear someone panting over the phone. “Gyeommie, where are you? I’ll pick you up.”

“I’m at Eunha’s house.”

“Who the fuck is Eunha?”

“That would be me.” The girl’s voice comes back, louder, like she’s picked up the phone. “And don’t worry, I’ve got him under control, he’s not gonna drunk text you anymore.”

“What’s your address?”

Jungkook hears Eunha mutter, “Is he fucking serious?” at what he supposes is Yugyeom, who mutters something back.

“He’s fine, dude, you don’t need to pick him up.”

Jungkook hears Yugyeom say something, but he can’t make out what it is.

“No, I’m _not_ going to give him my address it’s for your own damn good, Gyeommie!” Is the last thing Eunha says in the vicinity of the phone before hanging up on Jungkook.

Jungkook pulls the van over and screams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I DIDN’T MEAN TO DRAG NAMJOON SO HARD. Nothing but respect for MY future brother-in-law.  
> Eunha & Yuju cameo! There are girls in this fic! Wahahahhaha 
> 
> also,  
> Jaeyong


	6. An hour later

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An hour after the previous chapter. Just so we’re clear. Time is always a bitch.

Eunha gets up, considers putting a bra on, then decides to just slip a hoodie on as she answers the door.

She doesn’t really believe what she sees in the peephole, so she opens the door.

Sure enough, it’s the guy from the contact photo in Yugyeom’s phone. And he looks _pissed_.

“Are you Kookie?”

“Where’s Yugyeom?” Jungkook asks, shoving past her.

“Woah, dude, this is _my_ house, I-” Eunha feels a chill run down her spine. “How exactly did you find my house?”

“ _Where’s my iPhone_ , I found Yugyeom’s phone.” Jungkook mutters, opening the door to Eunha’s bedroom. Sure enough, Yugyeom’s lying under the covers, most of his clothes strewn across the floor.

“You know Yugyeom’s PIN? Duuuude…” Eunha makes a face.

“Gyeommie,” Jungkook kneels by the bed, gently shaking Yugyeom by the arm. “Gyeommie, wake up.”

Eunha doesn’t know what the hell she’s watching, but she keeps watching anyway.

Yugyeom rolls over and sits up before frowning down at his bare chest. “Whaa-?”

“Get dressed.” Jungkook plucks Yugyeom’s clothes off the floor and throws them at him. “Let’s go.”

“What the fuck.” Yugyeom rubs his eyes. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“I’m going to take you home.”

“Why…?”

“Because you’re drunk off your ass and butt-naked in a stranger’s house that’s why!” Jungkook picks up one of Yugyeom’s socks and throws it right into the guy’s face.

“Actually, we work together-” Eunha starts.

“Stay out of this!” Jungkook snaps at her, and Eunha just folds her hands in front of her.

Yugyeom spits his sock out. He feels his blood starting to boil again at Jungkook’s wide, angry eyes. He hates Jungkook’s eyes.

“Why is it that it’s ok for you to sleep with random strangers, but when _I_ do it-”

“For the record we’re just sleeping beside each other-” Eunha tries to clarify.

“Stay out of this.” Jungkook growls at Eunha, and she takes that to be her cue to step out of her own bedroom and close the door.

Jungkook turns back to Yugyeom, and without the light of the hallway he can just barely make out Jungkook’s shoulders heaving up and down. “It was ONE TIME! I BLEW YOU OFF FOR A GIRL ONE. TIME.”

“Then it’s my turn to do it.” Yugyeom folds his arms, mostly because he’s a little cold.

“You _don’t_ get to do it!”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s stupid and you- I’m not going to let you!”

“Wow, can’t argue with that, _Dad_.”

“I already said sorry you don’t have to be such a bitch-”

“You can say sorry all you fucking want but it’s up to me to accept the damn apology-”

“I don’t wanna argue about this shit here-”

“Where are we gonna shout about it? Outside?” Yugyeom cocks his head to one side. “Or are we just going to “move on” and act like this never happened like the last time-”

“You think I just moved on like nothing happened?” Jungkook can hardly breathe. “I still feel shit, okay, you don’t have to keep rubbing it in or pulling stunts like this-”

“You think I’m doing this because of you? Well, sorry, Jungkook, I’m not _always_ thinking about you-”

“Well I’m always thinking about you and what stupid shit you’re doing because you never know when to stop drinking-”

“As if _you_ don’t get drunk after _one_ beer-”

“This isn’t about me!”

“Oh, really, because I-”

“Shut up!” Jungkook punches a hole into Eunha’s robin’s egg blue wall, and Eunha yelps from outside the door. Yugyeom purses his lips into a line and leans against the headboard.

“Maybe it is about me,” Jungkook pants. “Because I was so fucking scared I didn’t know where you were I was worried-”

“Oh, _now_ you’re worried where I am.”

“WOULD YOU JUST LET THAT GO?” Jungkook stops shouting because he really can’t breathe, and he’s close to actually seeing red. He takes a few breaths, then sits on the bed, breathing deeply. 

“Hey,” Yugyeom gingerly places his hand on top of Jungkook’s. “You okay, man?”

“You scared me.” Jungkook says, almost a whisper.

“ _I_ scared _you_?” Yugyeom tries not to laugh. “I thought you were going to pop an artery there.”

Jungkook’s quiet, and Yugyeom pats his hand to check if he’s still alive.

“I’m sorry.” Jungkook says.

“For what? You’ve done a lot of shit in the past-”

“I can’t stop you from doing whatever or whoever the hell you want, that’s not fair. You don’t stop me from doing whatever or whoever I want,” Jungkook says. “Unless she’s not good enough for me.”

“No girl is good enough for you.”

Jungkook pulls his hand back to turn to Yugyeom. “What?”

“I mean, I wish it were that way.”

“Why would you want me to be single?” Jungkook frowns. “Oh. _Oh_.”

Yugyeom’s looking down at the street, away from Jungkook, his skinny white arms still folded over his chest. “You seriously haven’t figured it out yet?”

“That I’m in love with you?” Jungkook asks.

“No, that _I’m_ -” Yugyeom drops his arms. And his jaw. “What?”

“I mean, why else would I be so fucking scared for you all the damn time?” Jungkook shrugs. “Unless you were my kid, but that’s weird.”

“That’s very weird.”

The two of them sit there in silence for some time, and it’s a long time because eventually Eunha can’t take it anymore and she barges into the room. “WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE TO MY WALL?”

 

The drive back to Yugyeom’s dorm is quiet, save for the late night/early morning rock station Jungkook has on to keep himself awake. At one stoplight, Jungkook and Yugyeom reach for their phones in the cupholder at the same time, and end up holding hands. They don’t say anything about it, and keep holding hands until their palms are sweaty. Then they wipe their hands on their sweaters and pants, and hold hands again, with Jungkook staring dead ahead at the road and Yugyeom turned to look out the window.

Jungkook lets go of Yugyeom’s hand to pull the hand brake. “We’re here.”

“I know.” Yugyeom unclips his seatbelt.

“Wait.” Jungkook says, rapping his fingers on the handbrake lever.

“Yeah?” Yugyeom asks.

“What now?”

“…I’m going into my dorm? Oh.” Yugyeom leans over to plant a kiss on Jungkook’s cheek. “Thanks for the ride, man.”

“No, I meant- Kiss me again. Here.” Jungkook demands, pointing at his lips.

Yugyeom misses them on purpose, kissing his nose. “I can’t find your lips, they’re too thin.”

“Speak for yourself.” Jungkook reaches over and grabs Yugyeom by the back of his hair, pulling him into the longest, slobberiest kiss either of them had ever had. Jungkook pulls Yugyeom into his lap and pushes the driver’s seat into a recline so fast all Yugyeom can do is keep kissing him. Yugyeom’s wondering how often he’s fucked someone in the front seat of Jin’s car, and if Jin knows about it.

Jin definitely knows. Jungkook is officially the worst.

“Do you want to come inside?” Yugyeom offers, firmly holding onto Jungkook’s thighs.

Jungkook laughs, and Yugyeom backs up into the steering wheel with a loud honk. This is it. The moment they bring out the hidden cameras and everyone joins in and laughs at Yugyeom, that poor sucker who fell for whatever Jungkook’s bullshit was this time. There was probably a running bet, and Jungkook was gonna get millions of won out of Bambam.

“Stop laughing.” Yugyeom grabs Jungkook’s crotch and gives it a rough squeeze.

“Ow, what the hell,” Jungkook says, in between laughs. “I just-"

Jungkook looks up at Yugyeom hopelessly. "I don’t even know how to fuck a guy.”

Jungkook starts laughing again, and Yugyeom joins in.

“I don’t either.” Yugyeom shrugs. “Then we could just not have sex…”

“…Yet.” They say at once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They really don’t have sex…yet.
> 
> My head hurt writing that damn argument it's so long and stupid


	7. The next day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After the previous chapter. You know what, you guys are smart, you got this. 
> 
> Comical smut warning?? I didn't go into details but we all know who bottoms between the two of them...

“Gyeommie, wake up,”

Yugyeom smiles as Jungkook shakes his arm gently. He pretends to grumble as he tucks himself into Jungkook’s chest, curling up so his feet don’t go past Jungkook’s.

“I know you’re awake, get off my arm.”

Yugyeom kisses Jungkook’s bicep. “Your arm can handle it.”

“Handle this.” Jungkook lifts his arm suddenly, dropping Yugyeom onto the bed at a weird angle for his neck. His neck cracks, and Yugyeom sees his life flash before his eyes.

“Ouch _fuck_ what the fuck man,” Yugyeom rubs his neck.

“Aw shit, sorry.” Jungkook tries to pat Yugyeom’s neck, but he ends up closing his hands around it. “You okay?”

“You’re really trying to kill me, huh?” Yugyeom says, pushing Jungkook’s hands away.

“But if you die who’s going to make my life miserable?” Jungkook pouts.

Yugyeom cringes so hard he ends up a foot away from Jungkook. “Don’t ever. Do that cute shit again. It’s not cute.”

“Yeah, I think I just threw up in my mouth.” Jungkook says, cringing at himself.

“Let me check.” Yugyeom pushes Jungkook’s mouth open with his tongue.

 

Jaehyun’s not sure what Mingyu did, but it worked.

Bambam howls as Jungkook throws him off the table for saying his hair made him look like a coconut.

Yugyeom and Seokmin are locked in a battle over the last slice of omelette that Mingyu brought.

Minghao plucks Bambam off the ground. “Your fault for picking a fight with The Beast.”

Jungkook laughs. “Is that what we’re calling me now?”

“Yeah, you’re the Beast, I’m The Legend-”

“Hold up, I don’t want to be just a beast if someone else is a _legend_ -”

“I don’t make the rules, man.” Minghao shrugs.

“I think eating hardboiled egg with your bare hands makes you a beast, not a legend, dude.” Yugyeom says, looking pointedly at the half-eaten hardboiled eggs in either of Jungkook’s hands.

“Legends eat eggs raw.” Minghao says.

“Legends eat _what_ raw???” Seokmin asks, his eyes widening.

“Ass.” Bambam says.

“God _damn_ it Bambam!”

“Oh my god.”

“Petition to kick Bambam out of the gc.”

“You do that every other day!” Bambam whines. “Kick Yugyeom and Jungkook out for making us suffer for _weeks_.”

Everyone’s quiet as they either look at Yugyeom and Jungkook, or look away hastily.

“It’s Jungkook’s fault for being a slut.” Yugyeom says.

“If I’m a slut, then what’s Jaehyun?” Jungkook goes.

“A really handsome guy, duh.” Yugyeom goes.

Jaehyun intervenes and places the last piece of omelette on Yugyeom’s plate. Seokmin says, “I also think you’re handsome, why don’t I get the omelette?”

“Do you want a hardboiled egg?” Minghao offers, plucking half of one out of Jungkook’s hand.

“Ew. Guys.” Mingyu makes a face.

Mingyu’s not sure what Jaehyun did, but it worked.

_

_Kookie: Do you still have that game you bought for the PS4 even if u don’t have a PS4_

_Gyeommie: Yeah why_

_Kookie: Bring it over._

“Hi hyung, and hyung, and hyung, and hyung…and hyung…and hyung.” Yugyeom waves at all of Jungkook’s housemates, who just so happen to be cooking dinner when he arrives with the game. Actually, Jin is cooking dinner, Jimin has the recipe out on his phone, and the others are helping…ish.

“Oh hi, Gyeom, are you staying for dinner?” Jin asks.

“Uh, yeah.” Yugyeom says.

“He’s staying the night.” Jungkook says, jogging down the stairs. He grabs Yugyeom roughly by the arm and starts dragging him upstairs. “Don’t bother us.”

“Trust me, we don’t want to.” Yoongi says, but when the two of them are past the landing he looks at Jin and smiles.

Jin smiles back. “Jimin, can you check the recipe, how long was this supposed to boil for?”

 

Yugyeom’s just got the door closed behind them when Jungkook all but rips his own shirt off. Jungkook takes about three seconds total to strip down to his underwear, which he flings in Yugyeom’s direction.

“Woah, dude, calm down, I thought we were gonna- What the _hell_.” Yugyeom says, getting hit in the face by Jungkook’s boxer briefs. “Gross.”

“You can’t call my underwear gross if you’re about to suck my dick.” Jungkook says, starting to unbutton Yugyeom’s shirt for him.

Jungkook’s eyes are big and watery and _desperate_ , as if his hard-on didn’t make it obvious enough.

Yugyeom sighs and throws the game onto Jungkook’s desk. “You could’ve just texted _Come here & suck my dick_.”

“Come here and suck my dick,” Jungkook repeats.

“It doesn’t sound sexy when you say it, man.” Yugyeom starts to unzip his own jeans. “You sound like those kids who get one kill and are like _suck my dick n00b_.”

“Who the fuck still says n00b?” Jungkook asks, throwing Yugyeom’s shirt to the side of the room.

“You do. Way more than you think.” Yugyeom pushes Jungkook down onto his computer chair.

“Gross.” Jungkook says, spreading his knees apart till his thighs hit the handles of his chair.

“ _Gross_.” Yugyeom mocks him, making a face up at him before planting a soft kiss on the tip of Jungkook’s dick, which is already leaking. Yugyeom laughs, but he knows he’s not doing any better. Jungkook is the hottest person he has ever-

“Don’t laugh at it.” Jungkook says, grabbing a fistful of Yugyeom’s hair.

“I’m not laughing at it, I’m laughing at you.”

“Don’t.” Jungkook says. He pouts. “Just go down on me already, I’ve been waiting all day.”

“Poor you,” Yugyeom says, bracing his hands on Jungkook’s inner thighs. He’s staring at Jungkook’s dick, and his mouth is watering, but he honestly has no idea what he’s doing.

“What the hell are you waiting for?” Jungkook whines, stomping his feet like a toddler. “Just put it in your mouth already.”

“It’s really _big_.”

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Fuck you.”

“That’s the plan, Gyeommie.” Jungkook leans on one of the armrests, tapping it impatiently. “Any day now.”

“Why do I put up with you?” Yugyeom takes a deep breath before taking in as much of Jungkook’s dick as he can. He quits about three-fourths of the way and tries bobbing his head back and forth experimentally until he gets the hang of it.

“You call that sucking?”

Yugyeom spits Jungkook’s dick out. “Are you _really_ trash talking me right now?”

“I’m being honest with you, man, you’re really bad at this.”

“You do it then, if you’re the expert on- Hey.” Yugyeom says, because Jungkook’s pushed him down onto the rug. Jungkook’s pushing Yugyeom’s knees flat onto the floor in almost a full split, and it hurts. “Ow ow ow, what are you doing?”

“This is how you’re supposed to do it.” Jungkook says, giving Yugyeom’s already stiff dick a few rough licks before taking the whole thing without even flinching.

“Holy shit.” Yugyeom gasps, holding onto the edges of the rug for dear life as Jungkook bobs his head up and down so aggressively the floor underneath them creaks. His thighs are burning from the way Jungkook’s pushing them into this position, but it’s a burning he’s starting to like.

“Slow down.” Yugyeom moans.

Jungkook releases Yugyeom’s dick with a really loud pop. “Don’t tell me what to do.”

“I’m nearly there, go slow.” Yugyeom mutters back at him, feeling really cold with Jungkook’s mouth gone.

Jungkook bites Yugyeom’s inner thigh.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Yugeom asks, sitting up to look at the red tooth marks in his white skin. It’s annoying, but also really hot. Like Jungkook.

“Don’t tell me what to do.” Jungkook repeats.

Yugyeom wants to say something back, but Jungkook’s bent down again and his hot breath on Yugyeom’s body has the latter nodding and saying, “Yes, sure, whatever you want.”

“That’s more like it.” Jungkook grins, his mouth just an inch away from Yugyeom’s skin. He bites Yugyeom’s other thigh, and before Yugyeom can say anything, he slides his mouth around Yugyeom’s dick. Jungkook knows he’s good at his, and feels himself cum just a little bit watching Yugyeom shut his eyes so tightly that tears trickle down his cheeks. Yugyeom’s trying so hard to keep quiet, chewing on his bottom lip, that Jungkook slows down just enough to make his best friend whimper loudly, then flush bright red. Was Yugyeom still his best friend? Yeah, best friends suck each other’s dicks all the time. And best friends cry when they come in their best friends’ mouths for the first time. And best friends definitely swallow.

Jungkook manages to look so smug while wiping cum off his face that it pisses Yugyeom off.

“So?” Jungkook asks, leaning over Yugyeom with his hands on either side of Yugyeom’s face.

“I didn’t really see it that time, can you do it again?” Yugyeom says, resting his head casually on his hands.

Jungkook smirks, one side of his mouth pulling higher than the other. “Can you?”

 

Someone’s knocking on Jungkook’s door.

“Hey guys,” Jimin’s voice goes from the hallway. “Dinner’s ready.”

Yugyeom bites down on his lip.

“Do you want dinner?” Jungkook asks casually.

Yugyeom eases his grip on the sheets he’s been crumpling, rolling his eyes. “Maybe later when you’re not balls deep in my ass.”

“Okay.” Jungkook pats Yugyeom’s back, and Yugyeom just rolls his eyes again. He shouts, “We’ll eat later!”

“Sure.”

Yugyeom keeps Jungkook still, straining to hear Jimin’s light footsteps pad down the hall, then down the stairs.

“Is he gone?” Yugyeom whispers.

“Why are you so afraid they’ll hear us?” Jungkook asks, starting to thrust into Yugyeom again. “They know what we’re doing.”

“Don’t you have even a _little_ shame?”

“I don’t have a little _anything_.” Jungkook says, punctuating it with a hard thrust.

“You’re the worst,” Yugyeom moans.

“That’s not what you said a while ago.”

“Are you like this with everyone you fuck?” Yugyeom whines, because it’s hard to sound as annoyed as he is when he knows he’s about to completely lose it. Again.

“No.” Jungkook bends over to hug Yugyeom as he thrusts into him. “Just you, babe.”

“Who the fuck do you think you’re calling ‘babe’?”

Jungkook laughs as he kisses the back of Yugyeom’s neck, then shoves his dick in hard enough to draw out an embarrassingly loud moan.

 

Namjoon’s about to spoon some rice into his mouth when he hears screaming from the room just above him. He stops in mid bite, looking around the table. All of them pause briefly, then go back to eating their dinner like they can’t hear their annoying freshman housemate screaming his boyfriend’s name.

Namjoon chews on his rice slowly.

“Could I have more soup?” Taehyung asks.

“We should leave it for the kids.” Yoongi says, as the screaming dies down into moans.

“They’re going to be really hungry.” Jimin giggles, as the bed and floor upstairs stop creaking for the first time in what feels like an hour.

“We should probably cook more rice.” Hoseok says, looking into the rice pot.

“I love you!” Jungkook’s voice carries down from upstairs. “Iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou…”

They all fail to hold back their smiles as they scrape up and chew on the last of their dinner.

Jin grins at Yoongi.

Yoongi waves a hand at him, like he’s trying to swat him away. “Yeah, yeah, I owe you a million won, I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love it when fuccbois fucc other bois. 
> 
> I’m going directly to hell, see y’all there. PEACE!


End file.
